The further and continuing adventures of the girl who sat in the back of your homeroom, reading and daydreaming.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Oh, my.
There's probably "something wrong" with my "sense of humor," but this gal makes me laugh until tears are rolling down my cheeks and I can't take a decent breath or see straight.
My "large," "commercial" "garage" came with a very professionally-lettered sign reading, in full, "No" "Tools" "Loaned". I think that says it all.
May we soon see sites devoted to apostrophe's, dashes-or hyphens-or the lack-thereof, or the elusive semicolon (use of which, an antigrammarian once told me, makes one "almost an asshole")?
What sort of person would object to semicolons? I can only imagine it would be the sort of person who never has a sentence almost end while the thought continues; in other words, Not Me. (Oooo, Inappropriate Capitalization: there's another for your list. How about dotting lower-case "i" with a heart?)
There's plenty of niche snark out there already -- for instance, engrish.com. Enjoy!
Heh, for "Not Me" you go to the "Family Circle" sites.
Inappropriate Capitalization is a Different Case Entirely. Tom Wolfe and P.J.O'Rourke (in his Lampoon days) turned it into an Overused Literary Device, it being So Expressive of Ironic Intent. Mocking overused devices ("Content Warning") doesn't translate into a witty website; it turns into a Degree in Literary Criticism/BTDT.
After perusing the photographs, it would seem that there is a segment of the literate(?) population out there that thinks that quotation marks are used to emphasize words, sort of like italics or bold lettering.
To be fair to wanderers in the bleak desert, Tam does use the semicolon in truly new and unexpected ways. On occasion, she pushes the semicolon envelope, perhaps beyond what its inventors intended. Tam's semicolons...
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My "large," "commercial" "garage" came with a very professionally-lettered sign reading, in full, "No" "Tools" "Loaned".
ReplyDeleteI think that says it all.
May we soon see sites devoted to apostrophe's, dashes-or hyphens-or the lack-thereof, or the elusive semicolon (use of which, an antigrammarian once told me, makes one "almost an asshole")?
What sort of person would object to semicolons? I can only imagine it would be the sort of person who never has a sentence almost end while the thought continues; in other words, Not Me. (Oooo, Inappropriate Capitalization: there's another for your list. How about dotting lower-case "i" with a heart?)
ReplyDeleteThere's plenty of niche snark out there already -- for instance, engrish.com. Enjoy!
Heh, for "Not Me" you go to the "Family Circle" sites.
ReplyDeleteInappropriate Capitalization is a Different Case Entirely. Tom Wolfe and P.J.O'Rourke (in his Lampoon days) turned it into an Overused Literary Device, it being So Expressive of Ironic Intent. Mocking overused devices ("Content Warning") doesn't translate into a witty website; it turns into a Degree in Literary Criticism/BTDT.
I once had a guy on the web hitting on me because I knew how to use semicolons...
ReplyDeleteFor a grammarian that obsessed, the wilds of cyberspace must have been a bleak desert indeed.
After perusing the photographs, it would seem that there is a segment of the literate(?) population out there that thinks that quotation marks are used to emphasize words, sort of like italics or bold lettering.
ReplyDeleteTo be fair to wanderers in the bleak desert, Tam does use the semicolon in truly new and unexpected ways. On occasion, she pushes the semicolon envelope, perhaps beyond what its inventors intended. Tam's semicolons...
ReplyDeleteI can't go on.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteTam? Tam? Now you're meeting new guy-minions on my blog! I'd be envious if I wasn't so much in awe.
ReplyDelete"Dear Ghu, if grow up, I wanna have nice semicolons; semicolons just like ones Tam uses would be the kewlest."