Live crabs, of course. In a vending machine. Oh, chilled way down; they're essentially hibernating. Pop in your money and out drops a crab, caged in a little plastic holder. You take him home and-- Dinner. Or perhaps an aquarium if you're soft-hearted.
You may have seen this elsewhere. I hadn't. It trumps the weirdest ideas I've had all week.
That's a new excuse: "I, uh... got 'em from an infested vending machine. Yeah, that's right, a vending machine."
ReplyDeleteIf you had crabs that size, you wouldn't need an excuse!
ReplyDeleteThank you Japan.
ReplyDeleteIt's uh.... just what we always wanted.
I want a monkey vending machine! How cool is that?
ReplyDeleteShermlock, I can see it now: you drop in $1.298; a big graboid arm reaches over the tiny cells where they wait, half-awake; it swoops down, picks up one of the little blighters by the head, swings him over to the front of the machine and drops him down the hopper, thumpety-thump; he pops out the front, flings a handful of poo at you, screeches and scampers away, under the machine...where, no doubt, a kind of giant dustpan scoops him up and drops him back in. Hours of fun!
ReplyDeleteHmm. I've bought live crab before but never out of a vending machine.
ReplyDeleteYup, the Nips are crazy weird. It's a damn' shame it cost us so much blood and treasure 68 years ago to persuade them to stay at home and mind their own business.
ReplyDeleteP.s. Ironbottom Sound, anybody?
ReplyDeleteI take it you have not seen the skill crane machine that lets you go after live lobsters. The usual arrangement is, if you catch one, the bar that has the machine will cook it up for you.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.thelobsterzone.com/
I have seen one in a bar, and thought it was rather interesting, until I watched someone try to get one. Seeing the little suckers scramble out of the claw at the last second seems a little too much like torturing them for me.
What's next? Lobster?
ReplyDelete