Canadian Cooking
(to the tune of American Woman)
Canadian cooking, stay away from
me
Canadian cooking, let that stuff be
Don't come 'round my kitchen door
Don't wanna see round bacon no more
I got less tasty things to do
Than spend my time gettin’ fat with you
Leaf maple,* stay away
Canadian cooking, nohow no way
Canadian cooking, stay off my plate
Canadian cooking, it’s an awful fate
Don't come 'round my kitchen door
Don't wanna see round bacon no more
Butter tarts can hypnotize
Feed someone else those backward pies
Leaf maple, go away
Canadian cooking, nohow no way
Canadian cooking, I said, get away
Canadian cooking, nohow no way
Don't come 'round my kitchen door
Don't wanna see round bacon no more
I don't need your hot poutine
Rappie pie or baked beans
Butter tarts can hypnotize
Feed someone else those backward pies
Leaf maple, go away
Canadian cooking, nohow no way
Canadian cooking, stay away from me
Canadian cooking...peameal bacon, please…
I dunno, I gotta get a plate
Maybe, I’ll get a taste, otta try poutine
I'm gonna eat like a Canadian
I'm gonna eat like a Canadian
Y’know I’m gonna try
I’'ll maybe eat lots and sigh
A-yum yum, a-yum, yum
Yum yum, yum yum
Tastes so good to me and it’s so good for you
(Canadian cooking )
I’ll fill my plate right full up, that’s what I'm gonna do
(Canadian cooking)
I'm gonna eat it oh yeah, I want to so
I gotta try, I gotta try Canadian cooking, yeah
(ETA: You may freely repost this parody provided you credit me, "Roberta X," and link back to this post. Some people seem to have forgotten how this works.)
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* It has been suggested that the French phrase "feuille d'erable" would work better. Right number of syllables and yes, it's "maple leaf" and a proper nod to Canada's other language.
(ETA: You may freely repost this parody provided you credit me, "Roberta X," and link back to this post. Some people seem to have forgotten how this works.)
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* It has been suggested that the French phrase "feuille d'erable" would work better. Right number of syllables and yes, it's "maple leaf" and a proper nod to Canada's other language.
Poutine is the patented pension plan of Canadian cardiologists, but butter tarts, Nanaimo bars,real maple syrup and bacon are what we run on.
ReplyDeleteAccompanied by proper beer and rye whisky of course.
Of course!
ReplyDeleteThere's an entire Wikipedia article on Canadian cuisine, as vast and variegated as the country itself. While poutine doesn't much tempt me, there's plenty else described that does.
With the exception of maple syrup and Canadian bacon, I've found all Canadian cooking to be Gawd Awful... maybe they just don't know any better
ReplyDeleteReal maple syrup and bacon!
ReplyDeleteOO-RAH!
gfa
PS - their laws, not-so-much!
Can't have everything.
ReplyDeleteI had Doner Kebab pizza in London, Ontario. Like a giant flat gyro with tzatziki sauce instead of tomato sauce and covered in that shaved lamb-SPAM, onions, and cheese. Beats a sausage and pepperoni pie any day.
ReplyDeleteDon't get the milk-in-bags thing, though...
Butter Tarts can hypnotize, Fatten someone else's thighs
ReplyDelete"Only Canadians think corn starch is a spice." Kerry Stratton. (not so famous conductor of small orchestras)
ReplyDeleteBruce
ReplyDeleteThe problem with your parody Roberta is the term 'Leaf Maple'. You're replacing the five syllables of 'American Woman' with three syllables so it disrupts the rhythm and the two words are reversed, which is awkward. Maybe 'feuille d'erable' (FOY-uh DAY-RAB-le) which is French for 'maple leaf' and has five syllables could be substituted?
As for poutine, there are now as many variations of poutine as there are pizza. Every chip truck has their own specialties as well as the traditional chicken gravy, fries and fresh curds version. I've eaten cajun style blackened catfish with green tomato relish, Italian with pepperoni and mozzarella in tomato sauce, etc, etc.
Al_in_Ottawa
So is this a subtle hint about the next chapter of "I Work On A Starship"?
ReplyDeleteAl_in_Ottawa: Thank you! That'll work!
ReplyDeleteI am Canadian and I do not like maple syrup. The other stuff is great though. Hey, more for us.
ReplyDelete