You're doing it wrong, Local TV News. If it happened three days ago and ended happily, it's not still news today.
Perhaps I should explain: news is, by definition, new. There's all kinds of interesting things about the Spanish Civil War, a sort of dress-rehearsal for WW II foisted off on a nation in the process of working out its own fate the hard way -- but I don't expect you to be telling me about that, either.
Monday, an expectant couple (well, he was expecting; she was plenty certain) were hurrying down the freeway to the hospital, having left home perhaps a bit later than they should have. Overtaken by fire trucks, they fell in behind...and made good time to the jacknifed semi that had traffic at a standstill.
Hubby asked a fireman for help, the firemen summoned an ambulance and, wonder of wonders, the young mother made it to the hospital in plenty of time; her baby was born nearly four and a half hours later. Mom and child are doing fine.
Heartwarming and cute the day it happened, with live images of the ambulance at the scene and speeding away. Three days later? Yawner, unless you happen to be a family member.
News: it's new stuff. Like the ads say, "Live, local and late-breaking." Hey, aren't those your ads, Local TV News?
Y'know, the newspaper was never much either, but at least I can use it to line the cat's litter box.
T. R. MCELROY'S STREAMLINED TELEGRAPH KEYS
9 months ago