Saturday, March 29, 2008

Balkanization Now

Tam has posted about the California exodus; there are Vermont separatists, NH secessionists, folks lookin' to revive the Texas Republic an' plenty of people ready to run a sawzall down the Mason-Dixon line an' y'know what?

I say lets do it. It's time. IL (or perhaps just Cook County/Chicago and its ADI) really should be its own little hoplophobic police state; NY and CA ought to be able to follow their hearts to full membership in the EU.

Squeaky points to the Federal Reserve's presiding over what is surely an impending meltdown and that is but one of the many delightful ways in which the Federal Union has created more mess than utility. It's what they do.

This has not always been the case but it is now. I have a deep sentimental fondness for the nation created by the Founders and Framers, but it's outlived its usefulness and become a burden on the States. It's time to pull the plug. Oh, we'll set up some loose military alliance to keep the Army, Air Force, Navy and Marines goin' but the rest of it, from NASA to HUD to the DEA, they can hold bake sales, ask for donations or just shut up shop.

The States will still be there; oh, they'll change, they'll form their own alliances -- perhaps we'll see Jefferson or Franklin reborn; perhaps southern Illinois will hook up with Missouri and the central regions will ally with Iowa. Who knows? --But it's gotta be better than the mess we've got now. Look, it's already like crossing an international border to go from IN to IL, or enter CA from anywhere; might as well go whole hog.

Balkanization now! Why not?

(Posted mostly in jest but, y'know....?)


Alan said...

Have you been reading "Friday' again?

Roberta X said...

Guilty as charged; and Ward Moore ("Bring The Jubilee") and other writers as well.

CA's boosters are fond of pointing out that as a standalone country, it would have the sixth most prosperous economy in the world. Why not let them have a go?

...Few folks can point on a map to where Jefferson and Franklin would have been, let alone identify which one is still as real as the Conch Republic.

jed said...

Now I'd be in favor of that. I can see northeastern Washington, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming and Colorado, maybe a few more neighboring states, doing alright together, except we'd have to send Boulder to San Franciso, and find someplace to put Denver as well. Unfortunately, we'd be landlocked -- I suppose we could include Oklahoma and Texas. I don't know anything about the political climate in Oklahoma.

I'd rather have a Pacific port though. Maybe we could send raiding parties to chase the lefties out of western Washington. Yeah, I know, we'd be violating their property rights, but it'd be fun!

George said...

Morning, Roberta;

We have similar notions up here in Canada. The reality is that we are a very long, incredibly narrow country ... stretched from coast to coast ... butt tight against the USA border. We should hive off all those who want to leave ... eg. Quebec, BC ... cut the entire north loose ... and let the rest of the 'provinces' go it on their own.

Won't happen, though. Canucks are even more effed up than our American cousins.

Good thing to think about this morning, though.


Mark Alger said...

Odd, isn't it, how people are so concerned that "we" might be going the other way -- toward consolidation -- when far more trends seem to be toward atomization (a.k.a. Balkanization) than otherwise.

My main fear is that, should the U.S. fragment, there would be nowhere where the American Beaux Ideal would hold sway. An more's the pity.


phlegmfatale said...

Uh, where do I sign?

Roberta X said...

Spoken (or written, actually) as a true daughter of the Lone Star State, Phlegmmie!

Joseph said...

Being from IL originally, and Cook County to boot, most of IL is rural and kinda conservative (away from Chicago). However, Chicago holds the financial and political clout in the state.

Oklahoma has been called the buckle of the Bible belt. I lived for 10 years in Tulsa, and it is a fairly conservative, pro gun state from what I recall.

Rob K said...

Not as radical an idea, but something I've long thought about is that large cities like Chicago and New York should be carved out into their own states, freeing the rest of their containing states of their poisonous influence.

Another thought I've had is that no municipality should be allowed to grow geographically larger than it's containing township.

Big cities are a metastasizing cancer.

Adrian K said...

RE: the Northwest stuff Jed mentioned:

I'd seriously buy into that one. I'm over here on the Wetside still, but I'm still trying to figure out a way to move to one of the Idaho college towns.

And isn't Lewiston a seaport due to the dams on the Snake River? It's not like Seattle and Portland aren't already importing foodstuffs grown inland, and some pretty big chunks of SW Washington might even join in.

If I had me druthers, I'd just as soon have the easternmost layers of Illinois counties between Kankakee and Danville move the state line over a wee bit. It pains me to see my "hometown" in Iroquois County painted with the same damn Daleyist brush.