Saturday, March 01, 2008

"When I Go..."

[Warning for the humor-impaired: This is dark humor. It is not real. It has no hidden meaning. Try to play along with the grown-ups].

We all know the old joke that ends, "...peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and trying to get out like his passengers...," right?

So, relaxing after a day of banking, shopping[1] and eating the very best sort of deli food (Eat at Shapiro's. Bring money and an appetite. You'll be happy), us Snark Sisters were riffin' on the theme, things like, "Enjoying a fine cigar, not panicking and trying to flee the flames like the passengers on his dirigible," and "Lost in nitrogen narcosis, not fighting over the emergency oxygen mask like the other people in his bathyscape," when we[2] hit on it:

"When I go, I wanna be happy an' fulfilled like my crazy great-uncle, not scared, duct-taped and helpless like his hostages...."

1. Vroom! Further, deponent sayeth not.
2. And by "we" I mean "me," in the case of the example cited; but I do, from time to time, muster the grace to blush over the manner in which I prattle on. Besides, Tam snickered. --H'mm, that doesn't actualllly dilute it any, does it?


Turk Turon said...

Wow! This must be Snark Week!
Hey, what's with the "vroom" remark? You guys weren't out pricing wheels, were you?

Lorimor said...

Hmmm... maybe they got a bad load of yeast in the bread.

Carteach0 said...

Vroom? Sayeth more!

Not dark humor..... and funny still

Mark said...


Uh, I mean "how shockingly insensitive".

No, wait - right the first time. Carry on.

Roberta X said...

Lorimor: polly we should not have made Pharoic beer with it?

Vroom: not sayin' a thing for awhile yet!

Breda said...

The Snark Sistahs! perfect. I am sometimes very much reminded of Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg when I picture the two of you together. But which one is witch? =)

Lorimor said...

Gack! God only knows what kind of scenarios would have been dreamed up if that malevolent yeast had become beer (of any kind.)

Lorimor said...


Something very fast.

An Audi S8?

Somethin' that can shove a little bit.

I'm also gonna need a nitrous system.

Turk Turon said...

I'm gonna watch "Ronin" as soon as I finish "Last Man Standing". I wanna see how Bruce Willis gets 35 rounds from a seven-round magazine! Well, it's in the movies, so it's gotta be true.

"How'd you get into this business?"
"I was seduced by a wealthy scoundrel.
"Same as me!"

But back to the subject at hand: what about this "vroom"?

Larry said...


Turk Turon, I just watched Daredevil and noticed Elektra continue pulling the trigger click! click! click! on an empty semi-auto, looked like a Glock.

That trumps your never-ending magazines, any day.

HTRN said...

Roberta, sounds like a variation of the old joke: "I want to leave this world the same way I came into it - Naked, screaming, and covered in blood".

Roberta X said...

Ahh, happy memories! ;)