Thursday, January 28, 2010

Indy Star: Hysteria And Misinformation

Dennis Ryerson thinks you're a menace.

Talk about wetting the bed after the mattress is already soaked! The Indy [Red] Star is back to bleating nonsense about gun permits, even after measures to make the list of citizens with carry permits private have passed in both chambers of the State government.

Editor Ryerson continues to sling generalities around instead of actual numbers; you see, giving you enough info to do the math would reveal the appalling silliness of his steaming rhetoric. He tries to link two unrelated items: A) a handful of fraudulent applications for License to Carry Handgun which were erroneously granted and then yanked when the dear little angels got themselves into trouble or were otherwise caught out and B) the very real need to keep any lout with $42.00 American to spend from receiving the entire list of permit holders, complete with names, addresses and other personal information.

Let's apply a mild degree of Fisk-o-lene to the matter, shall we?

He claims, "Gun owners and non-owners alike bombarded them with pleas to keep the bad guys from knowing who might have a gun in his house..." Wrong! Indiana law does not require any sort of a permit to have a gun in your house; if you can pass the Federal background check -- remember that one? The one you and the Bradys told us was The Answer? -- you're good to go.

Then we're told, "Far fewer have spoken up for the cause of open and responsible government." Yeah, 'cos making it possible to a stalker to get the home address of the person he's stalking -- who had to get a permit in order to defend themselves against him -- is "responsible government" and putting my home address out there as a gun-owner aids "transparency." I guess if'n I hand any real compassion for my fellow critter, I'd replace all my walls, cupboards, cabinets and gun safes with glass and Lucite versions!

After hinting that if Governor Mitch Daniels rilly rilly cared about, you know, things 'n' stuff, he'd veto the bill, we're treated to a veiled threat that's truly a monument to passive-aggressive phrasing: "Daniels, and lawmakers, might also keep in mind that the courts could become involved if a special area of privileged concealment is carved out of the state's existing open records laws." Dammit, he'll hold his lawyers until he turns just totally blue! That'll show everybody!

In the sole and only glimpse of actual intelligence, his penultimate thought is, "The problem is not law; it's enforcement." Um, yeah, that and people fibbing on their application; which is, O-M-G, illegal already.

But on what note does he end? Mounting to his cross, the long-suffering Journalist (who has earlier bid us be mindful that he never published any of the names and addresses of permit-holders, at least not yet...!) tearfully scolds us, "The menace is not the messenger; it's the man with the gun and nowhere to hide. For now."

Yes, you read it correctly: the Star's Editor thinks you -- and the 99.9 percent of permit holders who are law-abiding citizens -- are a menace. And probably that you're a mean ol' meanie, too, an' he's gonna tell Daddy the Governor.

Sheesh. Effigy. Rope. Tree. Some assembly required.

21 comments:

New Jovian Thunderbolt said...

Fiskolene? Is that like Touline or Naptha? Can I put it in my Zippo so as to like my Luckys?

Jeffro said...

Effigy? Methinks you're being kind.

Roberta X said...

I am. I am indeed. Also, timid creature that he is, that would be o'ermuch trauma for the soft, dewey-eyed poppet.

Drang said...

Remember: Professional journalists are the only ones professional enough to render a public opinion. Or something.

Don said...

I'm sorry that you spent the time to read that birdcage liner. That's time you'll never get back...

I'd sue him for that.

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

Thanks, Bobbi, for reading the Star so I don't have to.

Well, actually, I do, but it's more because I can't tear my eyes away from the trainwreck than it is anything else.

Joanna said...

The management at the Star is a bunch of hand-wringing pantywaists? Quel suprise! I'ma sit over here and laugh and laugh ...

Roberta X said...

NJT: depending on use, Fisk-o-lene (TM) can be toxic. It will ignite things but not safe for anything you'd want to inhale.

...H'mmm, need to design the label....

Joseph said...

Notice how these newspapers get vague when they want to prove their point and don't have anything to back it up with?

Indiana State Police routinely grant gun permits to individuals known for violence. State law allows for the denial of permits, local police often object to the granting of them, and those who get them sometimes go on to commit crimes.

Often? Sometimes? Really, what's that supposed to mean? How many exactly would that be? Surely, since you have the database you know. Was it in the instance of one of your boogie men that applied or was it random? Could it be that you're just making shit up?

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

You know, it just occurred to me: What the passage of these bills in both the Republican-dominated Senate and the Democratic-dominated House really means is that Indiana politicians now believe that the Indianapolis Star is irrelevant.

And the Star, like a petulant child, is just yammering for attention.

Poor Star. Here, have a lollipop and leave the governing to the adults.

(Not that legislators are necessarily adults, but they seem to be more adult-like than the Star.)

Joanna said...

Often? Sometimes? Really, what's that supposed to mean? How many exactly would that be? Surely, since you have the database you know. Was it in the instance of one of your boogie men that applied or was it random? Could it be that you're just making shit up?

Nice catch on that. I had profs who would have reamed me for using that kind of languagein in an article -- and that included columns and editorials. If anything, those had to be more strictly sourced.

Joanna said...

Nathan: I vote we all spring to mail a gross of lollipops and teddy bears to the Star. The bears should murmur "There, there" when you squeeze their paws.

John said...

My Dearest Ms Roberta, [neo-victorian greeting?]

Having followed the fever'd rantings of this juvenile editor, via VFTP, and also thought about effective counter-measures. Would it be possible to organize a nice friendly group of local CCW holders to visit with His Willful Ignorance?

Think of it a nice thing to do,in order to help this poor maladjusted frightened fellow to overcome his fantasy-based phobia about guns and gun owners. Wouldn't that be a thoughtful gesture? Perhaps even a sort of sort of St Valentine's Day remembrance, with the right scheduling.

Just as a guess, if one were to go over to the Gunowners March on Washington, [oops - 2nd Amend March] and look up the Indiana contact, a fair sized AD HOC contingent could be arranged, especially if you ran it the same day as y'r food and festivities Blogmeet.

What better than some good pavement walking with cheery, friendly sign-invites to His Royal Rule the World, to 'come on down' and meet these scary folks, in person. I mean, he IS an investigative, truth seeking journalist, yes?

If it's a slow news day, you may even get some television coverage. Just remind folks attending to refer microphones & cameras to a pre-selected spokesperson. A good mis-spoken, heartfelt, obscenity laden tirade with a bit of survivalist paranoia, however satisfying to deliver, just don't look so hot on the evening news.

Not that anyone would be that...ummm...stupid. But ya never know. Reporters have a nose for finding the worst representative example for your cause, in such situations.

Anyway, I doubt that you all need instructions in single-issue political organization and media handling.

The main thing that I see [as an old sign carrying protester & etc] is that this so-called Journalist is wide-open as the plains of Poland, for a good blitzkrieg right up the middle to his front door. You could present the inevitable representative of the rag, who will come down to assure you of their fine and factual reporting, with a package of baby diapers for His Superior Snot-Nosedness -- but then again, one must always think,"positive PR".

And, if sufficiently afraid of being seen as the wee and timorous beastie that he is, he may creep down to confront the scary monsters in person. Who knows?

Heck, you prolly get enuff folks to the blogmeets to stage an ad hoc pre-lunch demo, with practically zip organizational time. Then, a larger effort in a bout a week, followed by a third and bigger effort drawing y'r statewide support, thru y'r existing pro-gun groups.

One. Two. Three. Each larger, and with more media coverage-- making sure to call this guy out and to even have to sit down in public and discuss the issue. Away from his desk; out in the open. ;~`)

I'm just a sadist, I guess, but weenies like that sorry example of an alleged newspaperperson, remind me of nothing so much as vintage Cold War Pravda, in it's stiff and laughable prop-o-rhetoric.

Have fun, please.

Kindest Regards and Warmest Wishes for Your Continued Success,

[neo-Victorian closing]

John, the Red
West End of Lake Erie

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

Joanna: I LOL'ed :)

Steve said...

"You know, it just occurred to me: What the passage of these bills in both the Republican-dominated Senate and the Democratic-dominated House really means is that Indiana politicians now believe that the Indianapolis Star is irrelevant."

Virtually all newspapers are irrelevant and are only good for bird cage liners and daily dead-fish wraps. Oh, and starting a fire in the fireplace.

Fuzzy Curmudgeon said...

Yeah, yeah, newspapers are catbox liner, I get it. That's not my point. Newspapers used to have some power in the old days. This petulant editorial, threatening court action if Daniels has the temerity to sign the bill into law, indicates that Indiana legislators no longer have any respect for the Star as a political force.

Timmeehh said...

Fisk-o-lene (TM) is illegal up here. We use the government approved Bain-du-Fisc. It's far less harsh, and lemony fresh.

Roberta X said...

That's so sad, even if it is all lemony.

Stretch said...

Whenever the Washington Prav ... er ... Post calls to offer a subscription my Wench replies "No thank you. I can get the coupons and sudoku puzzles online."
And that is pretty much what most newspapers have become, delivery systems for coupons, puzzles and comics.

John B said...

Effigy? I'm lazy. Why use an effigy? Let's do the commie example, hang them all until we get one that can do the job right....

Rob K said...

I had a thought today: I'm glad this bill and the parking lot bill are going through at the same time. The Red Star isn't paying attention to the parking lot bill. :)