Friday morning, local TV newscasts pulled out all the stops and then polled the stopped: it was a-gonna SNOW an' by golly, they were all a-goin' on the air early as birds to save us from the Great White Frozen Horror.
Predictions called for possibly as much as -- oh, the dreadfulness -- an inch and a half of real-live SNOW! White Madness!
...What we got that day, on the other hand, was several inches of pure, pellucid NO: No snow, No rain, maybe a spatter of sleet that melted as it hit and furtively scurried off to the gutters, as if ashamed to be so paltry after having been fussed over so much.
To their credit, the TV newsies soldiered on gamely yesterday morning, and only forty (40) or so miles to the north, their intrepid minions found a crunchy white glaze on yards and better-insulated roofs. There really was snow -- and if it had been bad, why, all the machinery was in place, ready to spring into action, long before even the boldest brain-leech-controlled zombie Yeti could venture forth, plying its electric lash on the hapless and happy alike.*
I just wonder how many times they're going to have to do this before we actually get, you know, snowed on, let alone snowed-in.
* Zombie Yetis? Why, yes. But we spray for them now.
T. R. MCELROY'S STREAMLINED TELEGRAPH KEYS
7 months ago