Unholy, more like, with holes in 'em: my jeans. Worn clean out between the back pockets at the base of the spine, where there's a funny little bit of spinal column or coccyx or whatever, a bit dished in the center and raised at the edges. This answers the question, "If we put her in double-front work dungarees with durable knees, now what part wears out first?"
Rats. I've got to mend them, Carhartt having discontinued women's double-fronts because they're fools, or maybe too few of us do the kind of work that calls for 'em, and "so there" to all those lady geologists, archeologists, paleontologists, zoologists, botanists, electricians, plumbers and heavy-equipment operators. Sure, us distaff types may only spin up to ten or twenty percent of the total number of "persons who need heavy work trousers,", but let's see, everyone times, oh, 0.2 for number of workers-needing-this-workwear, times 0.2 for female workers: 0.276 billion, subtract ten percent for the "can't wear slacks" wimmens not counterbalanced by fellers who don't wear trews and we're left with, roughly, a quarter of a billion. You'd think even just the Western Civilization part of that'd be enough of a market but no.
I'd write more, but I've got to go sew a patch on the seat of my slacks.
1. I'd include custodiatrice and charwomen, but too many of them are represented by SEIU and I'm sure the limousine-commies in charge will ensure they're all issued proper People's Uniforms, no doubt at taxpayer expense
2. That's a joke, y'see? Distaff, see? --And if you thought that was funny, wait'll you find out that when one sort of weasel goes "pop," you're at the end of your thread....
3. As a contralto, "britches" is one of my three possibilities and perhaps the best, the other two being "witches" and "b!tches."
4. And thank you, Enrico Fermi.
T. R. MCELROY'S STREAMLINED TELEGRAPH KEYS
7 months ago