Monday, July 25, 2011

The Triumph Of The Will

Update:Will checked his comments yesterday and discovered he was not the "William" in question. He graciously writes, "I'd like to claim that it's been a more challenging year than usual for me, but that doesn't excuse my over-sensitivity anyway. I hope Roberta will accept my apology; I was out of line and out of order."

I do accept his apology, which is very much in order and lined up. Status quo ante, Will; you're not so silly after all.

[original post]
Or, No, They Are Not Always Talking About You

Found myself with an unlooked-for link today, from some guy who links to me sometimes, and who some of the people I read link to -- and I write that as some chick most readers know only 'cos Tam links to me occasionally, so don't mistake me for any kind of big-noise blogger. I do this for the fun of it and for the writerly exercise of having to put semi-coherent words on a screen every day.

Seems he is accusing me of, and I quote, "Gratuitous Innuendo," leading off by telling me to, "Just drop it woman."

Until today, he was a fellow I barely knew online and towards whom I bore, at worst, mild goodwill. What's got him spun up is a post in which I described how the Nazi-wannabe Djørk in Norway exploited people's normal deference to a cop and cited two chaps who are an example of what happened in one case when even a mild manner wasn't enough, the abusive, threatening behavior of Canton, Ohio Police Officer Daniel Harless towards one "William" (William Bennett, according to later reports).

You see, my offended linker's name --or nom-de-web -- is William, too.

To cap it off, he ends thus: "While I quite enjoy your extra-planetary fiction (I suppose an autograph for my copy of the book is right out), your more down-to-Earth delusions - at least as they involve myself - are becoming tiresome and quite rude. Please desist."

Ahead of that is some unclear thing about how he appears to believe I have twitted him over not thinking that shooting a guy in the back of the head could ever, ever be self-defense. I do not recall having done so [nevertheless I did, see update at 1], have difficulty imagining a scenario outside a James Bond movie where shooting a person facing away could be self-defense[2] and can only conclude he's blown some throwaway comment by someone, maybe me, maybe he only thinks it was me, into a titanic Internet diss war, the stuff of song and legend.

Wrong, wrong, wrong. Until today, I barely noticed you, William, and if you wanted an autograph on my little hack pulp, it only costs a note to me and postage both ways; that offer is open to anyone who actually paid good money for the thing. If I was going to call you out, I'd do it directly, I'd do it plainly and I'd link you ya to be sure you'd see it. Here's how it would look:

I wasn't talking about you, William. You have imagined some level of discourse between us that does not exist and I find you a silly, silly man, seeing slights and digs where none existed.

See? No innuendo. Oh, one more thing: I'd be pleased if you'd take me off your blogroll. I am painfully shy and suffer from a significant amount of social anxiety. I'm barely capable of dealing with most people even over the Internet and you, sir, you have made yourself exceptional that way. I do not care to be linked to by you. You have become, as one blogger once wrote, "...tiresome and quite rude. Please desist."
1. Update: found it! Tell me, if you were in line at the convenience store, the person ahead of line pulled a gun or a knife on the cashier and you beaned the robber with a milk bottle or whatever was in your hands, would he fail to turn away from his intended victim and towards you? It's a Walter Mitty scenario and one I work to avoid, but what you cannot avoid, you'd better confront).

2. I do think shooting mass-murdering mad dogs in the back, front or side of the head (or elsewhere) while they are themselves initiating force is something of a public service but I have come to accept that not everyone -- including some prosecutors -- feels that way and that fewer still ever get the chance


North said...

I'm very honored that you have dedicated your blog to me.

Wait, what? This isn't all about me?

Now I'm sad.

Roberta X said...


Drang said...

An ego of Presidential proportions there.

North said...

I was going to say "Just drop it woman." but apparently my attempt to mock "William" in comments has failed dramatically and now I'm in his sinking boat.

Perhaps it wasn't obvious that I was mocking him.

Phillip said...

>>I am painfully shy and suffer from a significant amount of social anxiety.<<

Can I still keep reading? I don't comment much, and I always try to be polite and respectful.

I will mention, though, that if I'm ever in a position where a store/fast food place/whatever is getting robbed by a man with a gun, I have every intention of shooting him from behind. If you find yourself in a fair fight, you've suffered a failure in tactics. :-) Of course, I'm from WV, where we've actually had the defense put forward successfully that if someone says they're going to kill you, you have the right to go find them and kill them first.

Roberta X said...

No, no, North, I should have said ;( -- 'Cos this makes me sad.

I dislike having to do it but bedamned if I'll be insulted by someone who won't even bother to do any homework or drop me a note about it.

North said...

Blogging is such an imperfect communication medium for any emotional exchange. I know if it were me you had addressed (or not) I would have said in a comment "Um what?" long before blasting you in a post.

(Even then, I wouldn't. Was this just an attention getting ploy?)

I hope William mans up and admits his mistake, or (and) removes you from his blog roll.

Roberta X said...

Drang: hell, mine is, too, or I wouldn't blog, but its not like either one of our first names is especially unique.

Josh Kruschke said...

As someone who's put his own foot in his mouth a few times with this blogging, I don't feel so bad about myself now.


Ruth said...

Ok, I'll admit that if you referenced an incident involving a "Ruth" I'd have to stop and think twice about it, but unless you and I had been just recently conversing on the subject in a heated manor (and a month ago isn't recent), I'd be hitting Google to find the referenced incident not throwing a snit over you using my name (and mine's not even that common any more)!

Heck, I barely follow the news and I knew which "William" you were referencing, so I say not your fault, and it sucks you have to deal with it.

Ambulance Driver said...

William's prose is every bit as stilted as Tam's wannabe-stalker, NeoNietszche.

Like her buddy Colt CCO said at the time, "It looks like he slew Roget's brontosaurus and festooned the room with his bloody entrails."

Drang said...

Well, my "secret identity" first name is not extremely common, and I was astonished to learn that there were others that shared it--when I was in First Grade.
I've managed to get over myself in the roughly half a century since...

Roberta X said...

AD: "Festooned with bloody thesaurus entrails," interior design by Buckley and Vidal? ;) (Yeah, but they could make it look good.)

Bubblehead Les. said...

For Frack Sakes! Just how many Bloggers named "William" are there? Lordy, there's probably 2 or 3 of them at most Blog Meets! Heck, there's even a Les or 2 out there!

NotClauswitz said...

That's why my name is Dirt: Crash, Clod, Berm or Pile - when I wet myself it's Mud.

Guffaw in AZ said...

Good to see this was resolved with civility!
We're libertarian-conservative types! Aren't we supposed to pull guns and shoot each other?
(OH! That's what so-called popular culture assumes)
Good on both of you!

Will Brown said...

Very gracious of you; thank you.

As for all the mockery, I earned it, I own it.

Roberta X at lunch said...

You're proving yourself to be a good sport, Will.

Justthisguy said...

Roberta, if I somehow magically instantaneously came up with lotsa money and other resources, would you marry me?

Roberta X said...


Larry said...

Justthisguy you would have to support her in the manner to which she has become accustomed (which probably means odd and esoteric electrical and mechanical bits).
WV: zinged. So many possibilities here...

Roberta X said...

Larry, all that and books, too. After seeing the film version of The Lord Of The Rings, my ex remarked, "Our house is just like a wizard's house!"

I chose to think of it as praise.