Thursday, June 18, 2009

Come And Take Them

Update: Joanna wins the internets by suggesting the addition to one's household of a box "...marked 'Not Knives, I Swear, Don't Bother Looking In Here.' Then when they open it and find it full of, I don't know, socks or something, I could shrug and say, 'Hey, it says right there on the box ...'"

[Come And Take] ...My one-hand-opening pocket knives, that is; I've been reading about this for awhile now. Sebastian linked to a newspaper column[1] from Bob "Will wear Wookie suit to run for office" Barr on the subject: It appears the Feds are after my Kershaw or any of the other one-hand-opening knives I own, both over-center versions and the ones with a stud or divot in the blade to let you flip it open easily. Even the ubiquitous Leatherman multi-tool looks to be on the verboten list.

Well, screw you, Feds. I'm keeping mine and I will buy more. They're tools and I use them every day, in innocent, useful ways.

At this point, they've got their fat heads set on banning the import of and interstate commerce in such knives, but once it's on the Federal naughty list, a lot of States will take the next step and ban 'em.

Here's a question: wouldn't an instantly-ready sheath knife be an even awfuller weapon? I've seen the videos (Cold Steel, I'm lookin' at you) in which a first-rate locking folding knife is beat on, used as a piton, etc. etc. but it stands to reason a properly made fixed blade-knife is even stronger -- and there's no fiddling around getting it open at all. And they're not especially difficult to conceal. Ewwwww! Cue panic!

The Second Amendment does not say "guns." It says "arms." You'd think that'd include knives, wouldn't you?

In some ways, this makes me even more angry than going after guns. I carry a gun (at least a little way) every day but I'm doing well if I get to shoot it every other week -- and that's target practice. But I carry and use knives all day, every day; use them hard enough they sometimes break, which means I'd be after some of those nice, banned ones, by and by.

What is it Tam says? "When it's time to bury your guns, that's the time to dig them up." And when it's time to bury your knives...? Might as well try the soapbox and ballot box first.
1. Insert obligatory steam-powered comment here.
2. He swears he had a gen-u-ine Road to Damascus moment; I'm just the suspicious sort when it comes to the motives of politicians.


reflectoscope said...

Its simple: Make everything a crime, so that they're all criminals, so they can all be hounded by the police.


falnfenix said...

i truly wish i wasn't going through a mess of dental woes right now...i'm itching for some new Kershaws, and i might not have much opportunity to buy them soon. :(

Joanna said...

Knife ban = #$%^ you, I'm carrying. I'll conceal it in my bra if I have to. Luckily, there's a lot of bra to go around ... ;-)

I forget where I read this, but if I had land I'd do it:

1) Dig a hole in a concealed place, then leave it alone.

2) When someone comes asking for your guns/knives/illegal home-grown tomato sauce, lead them to the open and obviously empty hole.

3) Pitch a fit that someone saw you burying the contraband items and dug them up after you left. It's a Plausible Deniability Hole!

Anonymous said...

reflectoscope, on the other hand, if we're all criminals, then there really wouldn't be much reason to worry about what is and isn't legal to own, just whether you can afford to get it.

Nathan Brindle said...

Joanna -- an empty shoebox marked "KNIVES" in your closet might serve the same purpose :)

Joanna said...

Nathan: Or one marked "Not Knives, I Swear, Don't Bother Looking In Here." Then when they open it and find it full of, I don't know, socks or something, I could shrug and say, "Hey, it says right there on the box ... "

Wayne Conrad said...

Arms is arms. That includes ammo, fire-hardened pointy sticks, crossbows, and yet-to-be-invented hand-held beam weapons.

reflectoscope said...

Anon - wait for it, its coming.


Mad Saint Jack said...

A fixed blade is faster to deploy than a folder or even an auto-knife (switchblade). With an auto-knife I always hesitate to make sure my grip is right, and hitting the switch is a fine motor skill.

Cold Steel...Cold dead hands........