Sunday, November 02, 2008


I admit it: I love shopping.

     My definition of "shopping" might not be the same as yours; to me, a gun show or a hamfest is shopping.  Feast of the Hunter's Moon?  Shopping, huge shopping: cloaks and pottery and knives and books, just plain wonderful stuff of all sorts and usually good value for the price, too.

     Big-box stores, not so much, though Tar-zhey often wins me over with the chain's sense of fun and style.

     Department stores?  Malls? It varies.  There are a lot of wondrous things -- Godiva chocolates, delightful rugs and furniture, housewares of a quality one rarely finds elsewhere but I find large enclosed spaces disorienting[1] and tend, therefore, to stick to a few I know.

     And then there's shopping for "nice" clothing.  Shoes aren't so bad as long as I avoid trendy places that sneer at size nine-and-a-half and bear in mind that most shoes simply don't fit the shape of my feet[2] but finding clothing at an upscale place can be a challenge: Most women my size and age are, well, not in shape, while most women who are in shape are significantly smaller and/or younger and thus trendier.[3]  For work, I wear jeans and basic tops -- T-shirts Summer, long-sleeved knits Winter -- and add a zip-up, hooded sweat-shirt.  This is, if you were wondering, not the thing to wear while shopping for  holiday-evening attire at a high-end department store or mall shoppe, especially if the jeans show signs of actual work-wear.  It results in either being completely ignored by the sales staff ("Maybe she'll just go away!") or the kind of nervous hovering that implies I'm about to Track Mud on all their Nice Things.

     I usually end up at the vintage/retro/consignment places.  They're no more likely to have my size but at least I don't get treated like poor relations.  And that makes for fun shopping!
1. I can't figure it: I'm comfortable in wide-open spaces, I actually like small enclosed spaces (and would go caving if I could find the time and equipment), I don't mind the city or the woods....but get me in a large, enclosed space and I get the creeps.  Sports stadiums?  Scary empty and a nightmare full.  Mega-malls?  Walking Hell.  Ghastly.  I couldn't even explain how bad it was until I found this.
2. Foot-shaped: wide of toe, narrow-heeled and with very high arches and insteps.  Most people appear to have feet the approximate shape of a submarine.  How can they even balance?
3. There are, gentleman readers, styles and "looks" that are rillyrilly cute at 20 which fall way worse than flat at 40.  Ew.


phlegmfatale said...

Shopping is tedious to me, so when I must, I am laser-focused on the task. I'll go to the mark-down sales at Saks or Nordstrom (which have exterior exits at the Galleria) where I've yet to see or hear a single snotty child wailing at one of those stores. I figure the extra money is well-spent for the lack of jangled nerves.

But junk stores? I can crawl around those endlessly. I lurves me some junk.

Roberta X said...

Oh, hells yeah!

Anonymous said...

Mmmmm...I loves me a good gunshow, fleamarket or junk store!!!

And Roberta, that alone should have gotten you that stimulus check!! Because you buy kewl stuff!!

WV: Whcarpe

staghounds said...

1. Thrift stores associated with the better off are greeat- opera, NPR rummage sales, the big old churches.

2. Sport shopping is fun- go someplace you'll never be able to afford something, to accomplish two things. First, to find out what (say) Prada shoe sizes fit, so you can buy them on ebay, and to enjoy the pampering.

They don't KNOW I won't actually buy a pair of duck guns at South Audley Street, or a shiny new motorcycle in the Ducati dealership.

Anonymous said...

I like shopping.

Just not for clothes.

Now, Industrial equipment(I luvs me sum cheep tooling!), Gunshops, Bookstores, Electronics, Home Centers, etc..

Pity there's never enough money to get everything I want. :(

Anonymous said...

You Know its sad. My wife was in an upscale dept store while dressed extremely casually. However she had about a grand burning a hole in her pocket as she needed clothes for work . Totally ignored by the sale staff. She spent her money elsewhere and I let the store manager know about it. The manager was extremely displeased to say the least