Let me put this as sweetly as I can.
If you quarter-witted marketing whizzes* don't stop trying to shove your damnable cable-TV-like service down my throat, I'm gonna cancel every last blasted service I get from you.
Seriously, I've seen your 'verse. I don't like it.
You're already the providers of my landline, cell phone and high-speed DSL, which by my count is at least one and possibly three services too many. Even if I liked the silly-ijit-box channels you want to sell me in a degree of rez and compression that hurts my eyes, I would be disinclined to hand any company a total monopoly over my media access, and especially not to AT&T, the "we spy on customers for the Feds" outfit.
There's no tellin' how many forests you have hewn down, how much oil, carbon black and aniline you've slathered onto thick, high-zoot chrome-coat paper in a futile attempt to sell me on a service I don't want, couldn't afford and would not, in any case, care to lease from you.
Y'all leave me alone and cease stoppin' up my mailbox with that crap. When I call in to pay my bill or ask howcome my cell phone service is so blamed spotty, I do not want a sales pitch for the dubious and tawdry wonders of your flavor of cable TV.
It's souring me on your company. And I was already lightin' up litmus strips that way.
Look, I need you for tip & ring POTS, 'cos I like old phones and you are the primo guys for that DC & dialtone jazz; after all, you invented it, or maybe snatched it out from under Elisha Gray. The other services, they sell on streetcorners, often nicer than the versions you offer.
So back off. I'll toss ya out and make my own dialtone if you keep pushing.
No amount of marketing can sell a service the customer does not want and even finds loathsome. But it'll lose you customers, toot de sweet.
* As in "whizzing" or "to have a whiz." And I don't mean speedy motion.
T. R. MCELROY'S STREAMLINED TELEGRAPH KEYS
9 months ago