Had it talking to the far end in a half-hour.
Learned to use a new software package and assembled a whole new page'o'data; figured out how to run the thing that feeds data to it, loaded it up and....
And fizzle, is what. No live data nohow.
Went back to square one, worked up a much smaller page, tried and tried and tried and finally got it to go. Edited that up to the full page of stuff, checked it, fine-tuned (does it assert high ot low? You guess and find out), shut down, relocated the computer and removed all the test stuff...a mere ten and a half hours after I first set foot on company property. Yeah. Ten. Point five.
Better believe I am reclaiming at least one vacation day from this.
Still: I won! The highly-necessary remote control is back in business. That's pretty sweet.